Top 10 Suggestions for Getting The Most out of Therapy
Starting therapy can be a commitment. It may be expensive, even with insurance. It demands time out of your week. And beginning therapy requires emotional energy. Before you embark, the following are my top 10 tips for getting the most out of your time, money, and energy.
Come to the session prepared! Think about what you want to discuss, in advance. If you have more than one topic, decide the priority. For couples therapy, talk with your partner in advance of the session and agree on a topic. You and your partner are in your relationship day to day. Trust yourself to know where to start in therapy.
Pick a therapist that specializes in what you want to work on. If you are grieving, pick a therapist who is well-versed in grief and ask them how they work. Make sure that the way they conduct the session is conducive to your preference.
Spend time outside of the session revisiting what was said. This can take many forms: perhaps it’s a journal, or 10 minutes before work to sit quietly and think. Keep in mind that therapy sessions are an hour of your week, and the real work takes place in all the others.
Prepare for direct feedback. Therapy is most helpful to us with a candid, even blunt assessment about what’s happening in our world.
Be open and honest with your therapist. The problems that are happening, but are not discussed, are unlikely to improve. It’s also helpful to share feedback with your therapist.
Don’t limit yourself to a therapist who shares your exact identity. While having a therapist who shares your identity can unquestionably be helpful, it could potentially limit your search and the expert in your area of need may not necessarily share your demographics.
Ask your friends for recommendations for their therapists, if they are willing to share. Chances are, if your friend has a good relationship with their therapist, the therapist might be a good fit for you too.
Make sure you’re connected to a good internet connection! There’s nothing more frustrating than pouring your heart out only to realize that your internet has frozen!
Prepare to be vulnerable. Real change requires us to be ready to take a look in the mirror and see ourselves, flaws and all. In couples, true intimacy is built on vulnerability between partners.
Consider whether you’re ready to make a change. It’s OK if you’re not ready to change or if you have raw, conflicted feelings about change. As the saying goes, “change is hard.” However, we finally make progress, only when we’re truly ready.
