How Do You Know When It’s Time To Switch Therapists??
My friends often ask me questions about therapy and one of the more frequent questions I get is “Should I switch therapists?” While there is no definitive right answer, here are my thoughts to help my friends, and you, think through this question. I hope this information helps!
Fit with your therapist matters
So much of the gains that are made in therapy can be attributed to fit. The numbers I’ve heard are up to 40% of therapeutic gains are due to client-therapist alliance. A poor fit is leaving so much on the table for you.
There are so many different methods of therapy
Different therapists have different training and the approach one therapist uses may be completely different from another therapist. For instance, some therapists use very structured approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which seeks to help you feel better by changing through patterns. Others are more talk-oriented and want to understand how your past is influencing your present.
You won’t be “starting over”
The complaint that I often hear is that people don’t want to “start over” with a new therapist. There is some truth to that. The information that you’ve shared may not transfer over. However, you can ask your old therapist if they can talk with your new therapist. I know this sounds awkward, but it’s actually common practice for therapists to touch base with each other (with your permission). Furthermore, any improvements you’ve had in therapy will stay with you.
We want you to feel better, even if it’s with a different therapist
My primary goal as a therapist is to help you feel better. Full stop. If I’m not the right fit for you, I am more than happy to help you find someone who is so that you can feel better.
There’s a downside to staying with a therapist who you’re not vibing with
This point is easily overlooked. The reality is that you’re using time that isn’t really helping you and it’s keeping you from potentially improving. Furthermore, when you stop listening to that little voice in your gut that is telling you this isn’t the right fit, you’re teaching your system not to trust itself.
